Crossover SUV's

Crossover SUV’s.


Now I know it’s a little hypocritical of me to comment on how other cars are ugly, I drive a Honda Element, but I embrace the “toaster” like nature of my car with enthusiasm …much like many of the owners do with the cars I’m about to talk about. However, I think most people will agree with me when I publicly call for the removal of the term “crossover SUV” from our vernacular.

Let’s call these Potatoes on steroids what they are…a mini van with attitude. Hell, lets go further and call them a pumped up station wagon, ok that might be too far but you get my point. I think it’s great that we as a nation are starting to move away from the 15 mpg monster SUV’s of the 80’s and 90’s and starting to look for better alternatives. Yet I think the term Crossover SUV is nothing more than a cover, a way for men, and some women, to trick themselves into believing they aren’t driving a family car…or more to the point, a mini-van.

All you have to do is look at the profile of a Ford Edge, Infinity EX, Nissan Rouge, Mazda CX-9, GMC Arcadia, Mitsubishi Outlander, Hyundai Santa Fe, Nissan Murano, Toyota Highlander, Honda Pilot…ok you get my point. All one has to do is look at the profile of any of these crossover SUV’s and compare it to a mini van and you will start to see similarities.

Granted, mini van’s have some differences, the main one being sliding doors, but come on…it’s the same thing. Grow up people, embrace your “family situation” and drive proud…its better than being caught in an AMC pacer, or really anything that cost more the $35,000, (do you really feel better about flaunting your money on a car that won’t last as long as Joe next doors 88 civic?) That’s another rant…

Rock and Roll Cliche's

Rock and Roll Cliché’s to avoid Part 1

In reality, Rock and roll is great because it’s so formulaic and pure and yeah it’s repetitive and impossible to avoid clichés and things already done. But its fun to point out the repetitions so here it goes.



1) Don’t write a song where you refer to Mary Jane as a real person and think it’s a clever twist on your actual love of Pot. Examples: Tom Petty and Silvertide
2) Don’t refer to your bad relationship as an addiction or disease of any kind. Examples: Rev Theory, Audiovent, Seether
3) Don’t write yourself into a corner where all your hits are sad and pathetic. Examples: Linkin park, Cold, Staind, Seether,
4) Put a half naked picture of a woman on your cover simply to sell copies to impulsive perverts. Example: Any 80’s hair band, Sterioside, Saving Able, Monster Magnet, The Black Crowes, Operator, Ted Nugent, Spinal Tap!!!
5) Write about “Breathing.” Examples: Nickelback, maroon 5
6) Don’t sing about how hard your rock and roll lifestyle is. Yeah the road is hard, but it’s not any harder than going to work in the mines everyday, or spending your days at a mill. You’re paid to travel and rock…any drug addictions and disease’s you pick up along the way is your own fault.
7) Don’t make it big on a massively popular song and then turn your back on it. If you have a signature song that made you a lot of money, don’t insult the fans by “growing out” of it or growing tired of it. You get paid to play music and you should remember its fun or at minimum it’s a way better job than most people have so pony up and play STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN!!! Examples: Led Zeppelin.
8) Don’t write a concept album and expect to be considered with the greats like Pink Floyd, The Who or Neil Young. It stakes more than a lot of weed and 28 1 and ½ songs to make it a good concept.
9) Don’t find the woman of your life and then write the worlds most sappy love song…if history is proof, this can only cause your relationship to go sour. Examples: Axel Rose, Whitesnake.
10) Don’t write a song pleading for a woman or anyone to save your soul. That’s what religions for, not rock. Examples: Nickelback, Another Black Day, Everlast.

11) Don't drape the flag all over yourself in a attempt to show patirotisim or more likely sel records to massive flag fans.

12) Ditch the makeup.

More to come…

Take that Wife!

So my wife has had a Blog for a few months now, but until today I have never been mentioned in it. However, a momentous occasion has occurred as I was noted in her musings/blog. Well in response I've decided to launch my own blog. Who knows what I'll use it for...funny list, rants about things that bother me, or reflection on life with my wife and daughter. Who knows but hopefully it will be interesting and fun to read.